5 reasons Love Island is brain rot.
I am a piece of trash in the sense I never ever watch television, but if I do, my guilty pleasure is 100% garbage reality TV shows, like Geordie Shore, Catfish, Keeping up with the Kardashians and of course, Love Island. I actually missed Love Island when it was airing, I only caught the last 3 episodes, but I have since basically watched the whole of 2017 Love Island because I obviously am not studying for A levels or anything.
I do have some beef with this program though, because as much as I am absorbed in how the other, less intellectual half, live, I still think it has had some detrimental effects on some of its audience. Kem Cetinay and Amber Davies won last year, both taking home £25,000 and subsequently ending their relationship not long after being exposed to the real world of fame and cold UK air. Not going to lie, I did vote for them, mainly because I'm a sad prick who jumped on the band wagon, but also because they were the most entertaining, which is what it is all about. HOWEVER, can we just mention, Amber was only 20 on the show...I am 20 in 3 months. That is INSANE. She is now a minted reality star and I am doing college for the fourth time. I guess sometimes life doesn't give you lemons, it gives you out of date avocado.
I think a brief intro to the couples or individuals I liked best is a positive way to start before I shred the program to bits...maybe? I liked Gabby Allen and Marcel Somerville because they are still together, they were really sweet and compatible in the villa and I was really disgusted to see the amount of racial abuse they suffered as an interracial couple in the outside world, but they kept on going and ignored everyone which must be hard to do. Sometimes I feel like half the population are neanderthal and see everyone as a race or a gender and not a person. I guess that's another topic though.
I also liked Chris Hughes and Olivia Attwood, because they were really fiery and unfortunately Olivia reminded me of myself...but with less decorum, (she said herself she lacks class). I know they've split now shortly after a few episodes of their own reality show and moving in together...sometimes I wonder how the alarmingly obvious doesn't hit some people, here it being DO NOT MOVE IN TOGETHER.
However, a success story from the seasons previous include Olivia Buckland and Alex Bowen, who are getting married in a few months, and Cara de la Hoyde and Nathan Massey who had a son together; Freddie-George De la Hoyde Massey (bit of a fucking mouthful tbh).
NOW. I suppose I should say why you shouldn't watch love island.
1) It promotes smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol.
Whether it means to or not, it does. Apparently there was an increase in teenage and young adult smokers after watching the show. As someone who smoked heavily in their teens I completely disagree with the way the show has portrayed smoking and the constant intake of alcohol as something that is blase and never mind. It was something they claimed 'just happened' and I can totally get how that can happen, but it is extremely worrying that people latch onto this 'trend'. Some of the islanders may have been actual smokers, and it isn't really the smokers who are at fault, it is the people who are seeing it as something positive or acceptable. Honestly, if you want to smell like a festering Wotsit and look the colour of piss on a sunny day that's your prerogative. I wouldn't do it though. Trust me.
2) It makes people think it's ok to be a bellend.
For lack of a better word, I have chosen bellend because it sums up most of the people in the villa at one point or another. Olivia's ranting and raging, Chris's stupid games, Jonny's playing the field, Marcel's Casa Amour scandal, Georgia taking Kem as her partner...God where do you stop. I get most of this must be scripted, and at least outlined and set up for shit to happen so the viewer at home is like fucking hell what a ride. However, just to let you know, you aren't going to get anywhere in the real world with people by using ridiculous slang and 'crackin on' with random girls/lads. Unless they're from the same limited gene pool the islanders seem to be from.
3) That shouting as communication is normal behaviour.
Right, this winds me up even writing it. Every reality show or soap has shouting as normal language and behaviour. When can we understand that if you want to speak to me, I am right here? You don't need to shout at me like I'm at the bottom of the garden. Granted, I am a loud person by nature, I was practically shouting at the doctor when he rummaged for me during my mums C section, but at least I do it without meaning to. These people literally think it is normal. When did it become normal?! Am I just living in some other world? Perhaps that would explain my lack of friends...
4) You can wear nothing and it's fine for your nan to see.
This is a hard one for me to write about, because I support girls who wanna wear whatever they like...I guess I've just never caught onto the thong-bikini trend? And those swimsuits which have literally no material from your boobs to your crotch? Like....what? Literally Speedo was about the last brand I wore when I went swimming, but then again I look like a piece of uncooked halloumi next to most of these island girls. Although, please can someone explain to me what was going on when Olivia Buckland's NAN was like yeah sound you're in a thong bending over on national TV? Or when Amber Davies's DAD was like whatever hun get your tits out. I am sorry but if that was my grandad I would have defibrillators at the ready because who the fuck would want to see me like that. Actually, I would rather eat glass than have my grandad see me wear a thong bikini. I have actually gained momentary arthritis just cringing from thinking about it.
5) Apparently sex on TV is sound.
Literally, do what you want, but just remember this will never EVER EVER go away. You will be 80 and be able to youtube your younger self shagging on television. Like dude. What.
I think the only redeeming part about this was...actually there wasn't anything. I think Jamie Jewitt and Camilla Thurlow, above in bed, were the only ones who had any sort of intellectual conversation. They spoke about Richard Dawkins once...yeah that's about it. Oh and she saves people from bombs. So that is pretty inspiring.
Overall I am 100% watching the new season because I have low standards when it comes to TV, and also because I do love some Caroline Flack in my life. But just remember it is a TV show.
P.S.. There was a girl called Malin in one of the seasons...I feel terrible saying this but now all I think is her parents loved Finding Nemo and spiced it up by missing out the R? Or just Malin fish in general? Let me know if I am just being a judgy bitch. Don't really...I don't care.
I do have some beef with this program though, because as much as I am absorbed in how the other, less intellectual half, live, I still think it has had some detrimental effects on some of its audience. Kem Cetinay and Amber Davies won last year, both taking home £25,000 and subsequently ending their relationship not long after being exposed to the real world of fame and cold UK air. Not going to lie, I did vote for them, mainly because I'm a sad prick who jumped on the band wagon, but also because they were the most entertaining, which is what it is all about. HOWEVER, can we just mention, Amber was only 20 on the show...I am 20 in 3 months. That is INSANE. She is now a minted reality star and I am doing college for the fourth time. I guess sometimes life doesn't give you lemons, it gives you out of date avocado.
I think a brief intro to the couples or individuals I liked best is a positive way to start before I shred the program to bits...maybe? I liked Gabby Allen and Marcel Somerville because they are still together, they were really sweet and compatible in the villa and I was really disgusted to see the amount of racial abuse they suffered as an interracial couple in the outside world, but they kept on going and ignored everyone which must be hard to do. Sometimes I feel like half the population are neanderthal and see everyone as a race or a gender and not a person. I guess that's another topic though.
I also liked Chris Hughes and Olivia Attwood, because they were really fiery and unfortunately Olivia reminded me of myself...but with less decorum, (she said herself she lacks class). I know they've split now shortly after a few episodes of their own reality show and moving in together...sometimes I wonder how the alarmingly obvious doesn't hit some people, here it being DO NOT MOVE IN TOGETHER.
However, a success story from the seasons previous include Olivia Buckland and Alex Bowen, who are getting married in a few months, and Cara de la Hoyde and Nathan Massey who had a son together; Freddie-George De la Hoyde Massey (bit of a fucking mouthful tbh).
NOW. I suppose I should say why you shouldn't watch love island.
1) It promotes smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol.
Whether it means to or not, it does. Apparently there was an increase in teenage and young adult smokers after watching the show. As someone who smoked heavily in their teens I completely disagree with the way the show has portrayed smoking and the constant intake of alcohol as something that is blase and never mind. It was something they claimed 'just happened' and I can totally get how that can happen, but it is extremely worrying that people latch onto this 'trend'. Some of the islanders may have been actual smokers, and it isn't really the smokers who are at fault, it is the people who are seeing it as something positive or acceptable. Honestly, if you want to smell like a festering Wotsit and look the colour of piss on a sunny day that's your prerogative. I wouldn't do it though. Trust me.
2) It makes people think it's ok to be a bellend.
For lack of a better word, I have chosen bellend because it sums up most of the people in the villa at one point or another. Olivia's ranting and raging, Chris's stupid games, Jonny's playing the field, Marcel's Casa Amour scandal, Georgia taking Kem as her partner...God where do you stop. I get most of this must be scripted, and at least outlined and set up for shit to happen so the viewer at home is like fucking hell what a ride. However, just to let you know, you aren't going to get anywhere in the real world with people by using ridiculous slang and 'crackin on' with random girls/lads. Unless they're from the same limited gene pool the islanders seem to be from.
3) That shouting as communication is normal behaviour.
Right, this winds me up even writing it. Every reality show or soap has shouting as normal language and behaviour. When can we understand that if you want to speak to me, I am right here? You don't need to shout at me like I'm at the bottom of the garden. Granted, I am a loud person by nature, I was practically shouting at the doctor when he rummaged for me during my mums C section, but at least I do it without meaning to. These people literally think it is normal. When did it become normal?! Am I just living in some other world? Perhaps that would explain my lack of friends...
4) You can wear nothing and it's fine for your nan to see.
This is a hard one for me to write about, because I support girls who wanna wear whatever they like...I guess I've just never caught onto the thong-bikini trend? And those swimsuits which have literally no material from your boobs to your crotch? Like....what? Literally Speedo was about the last brand I wore when I went swimming, but then again I look like a piece of uncooked halloumi next to most of these island girls. Although, please can someone explain to me what was going on when Olivia Buckland's NAN was like yeah sound you're in a thong bending over on national TV? Or when Amber Davies's DAD was like whatever hun get your tits out. I am sorry but if that was my grandad I would have defibrillators at the ready because who the fuck would want to see me like that. Actually, I would rather eat glass than have my grandad see me wear a thong bikini. I have actually gained momentary arthritis just cringing from thinking about it.
5) Apparently sex on TV is sound.
Literally, do what you want, but just remember this will never EVER EVER go away. You will be 80 and be able to youtube your younger self shagging on television. Like dude. What.
I think the only redeeming part about this was...actually there wasn't anything. I think Jamie Jewitt and Camilla Thurlow, above in bed, were the only ones who had any sort of intellectual conversation. They spoke about Richard Dawkins once...yeah that's about it. Oh and she saves people from bombs. So that is pretty inspiring.
Overall I am 100% watching the new season because I have low standards when it comes to TV, and also because I do love some Caroline Flack in my life. But just remember it is a TV show.
P.S.. There was a girl called Malin in one of the seasons...I feel terrible saying this but now all I think is her parents loved Finding Nemo and spiced it up by missing out the R? Or just Malin fish in general? Let me know if I am just being a judgy bitch. Don't really...I don't care.
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